Here we go, into the Second Round. No groups, no second chances. Whatever happens, whether there is extra time or penalties, two team will progress today and two will go home. And it’s a South American day today, all teams playing coming from the host continent. Let’s take a look at the matches:

BRAZIL (@Mojorainbw) v CHILE (@dusted1969)

5pm. BBC. Estadio Mineirao in Belo Horizonte. The host nation face Chile. Brazil have never lost to Chile at home in 26 meetings over 95 years. Maybe it’s time for a change. Or not. I’m hedging my bets but going to say:

Brazil 2 Chile 2 (after extra time it will still be 2-2. It will go to penalties. Brazil will then win.)

 

COLOMBIA (@SpiderMonkey987) v URUGUAY (@BottyB)

9pm. ITV. Estadio do Maracana, Rio De Janeiro. These two teams have only met once before in the World Cup and that was way back in 1962. Uruguay won 2-1. It’s time for Colombia to get revenge. Uruguay are without Suarez… he bit someone! Even know, days later, that seems so bizarre. Due to an act of idiocy, and also due to his inability to see anything wrong in what he did, the football gods will punish his team. My prediction:

Colombia 3 Uruguay 1

And now, a little late in the day,  here’s Klowz und Betti. Who the hell are they I hear no one other than me asking. It’s a good question. Last Eurovision they invaded our flat and took over for the evening. I really hoped I’d seen the back of them. But no! The reprobates turned up the other night demanding to sing (Sing? Mime? Who knows?) along to World In Motion by New Order.

Now, see, this was meant to be my wife, Zoe. She promised to do the John Barnes rap bit as soon as we hit the 50% mark of our £1996 target for Alzheimer’s Society for #tweepstake2014. But Klowz und Betti stormed in, took over, and insisted they would do it. They banished us from the flat, not even allowing us to hold the camera. And so it is a simple, amateurish affair; a fixed camera and the two of them doing their thing. What the heck, here it is.

If you like it, and you have a pound or two to spare for Alzheimer’s Society, please do donate here.

Enjoy the football. Good luck!

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Is it six days or five? Do we count today? Let’s keep it simple; The World Cup starts next Thursday! What kind of events kick off on a Thursday? Who organised this thing? And starting at 9 o’clock too! In Brazil! The whole thing is crazy.

Well, not quite the whole thing. In amongst all this madness is the perfectly sensible World Cup Tweepstake 2014: 32 Tweet people coming together to celebrate something some of them may have very little interest in whatsoever. Some of the folk in this Tweepstake might be like my mum, who is staying in her home this weekend because a festival is taking part in Heaton Park across the road from her. I said “don’t you want to see Snoop Dogg?”, at which point my mum livened up and said “ooh! Is it a new film? Is it any good?”

Here’s Snoop Dogg, now Snoop Lion, showing off his football (oh, if you must insist Snoop, soccer) skills.

So, on Thursday night the host nation, Brazil (@Mojorainbw) take on Croatia (@LadyLisaCusack). I’m no expert, but sorry Lady Lisa.

Throughout the tournament I’ll try and keep you all up to date but be warned, I’m no Glenn Hoddle.

But then is Glenn Hoddle Glenn Hoddle these days? More and more he reminds me of Zardoz.

Glenn Hoddle

Zardoz

zardoz-1973-06-g

Glenn Hoddle

So yes, I’ll post stuff here and I’ll post stuff on Twitter. You can find me @simonmhickson and I’ll try and always use #tweepstake2014.

Now then, prizes! No one has yet asked about prizes, but don’t worry, there will be prizes. In fact I’m going to do my damnedest to get 32 prizes, so everyone will go away with something. You’ve all been astonishingly generous in making donations to Alzheimer’s Society; the least I can do is scrabble some shit together.

If you haven’t donated yet please feel free to give what you can here. I’m hoping to get donations beyond the 32 to try and reach my preposterous goal of £1966. I know some of you have donated and you aren’t even in the tweepstake. Thank you. x

Here’s World In Motion by New Order to get you in the mood. If and when I reach the 50% mark for donations my wife, @zoleipar, has promised to recreate the John Barnes rap. I’ll do the Keith Allen suggestive looks.