Castaway 2

March 27, 2009

I had a casting the other day. Better than the one I had a few weeks back, but I still won’t get it. That’s not being defeatist. I did a good job, I’d be good for the ad, but I won’t get it because at some point, someone will go “isn’t he that bloke that used to be on kids tv?” And that’ll be that. For some adverts me being vaguely recognisable to a small proportion of the public may well be a good thing. Better wait for one of those to come along. What a change from the me of twenty odd years ago who would have run a mile from an advert, believing them all to be the works of Satan. However, I still have some principles. I will only perform in adverts for products that are demonstrably bad for people.

When I entered the waiting a room at the casting suite a voice called “Simon”. I looked over and said “Ben!” For it was Ben. I’m terrible at remembering names, and I haven’t seen Ben since we were teenagers at University, but I recognised him straight away. So things perked up from that point. After the casting we went and had a coffee. It was good to talk about old times and old friends. Sad too. Friends come and go; we all go through good times and bad times.

We were up for different parts in this advert. So, in an ideal world, we’ll both be working together again after a quarter of a century gap.

Then I wandered for a bit. When it started to snow… Snow? No one mentioned snow. Then again, I had seen no forecasts. So, when it started to snow I did the sensible thing and popped into Fopp and bought Setting Sons by The Jam for £3 (I have it on vinyl, but that and all the other stuff- turntable, amp- are all in storage).

As I walked home I looked at the clouds. I should have taken some pictures but my arms were too lazy. Here’s a couple of old pictures I came across recently. I had a file called “last pics on the Nikon” and I was intrigued to see what was in there. My camera’s Samsung now, but it seems to have some ghosts caught in it. I can’t remove them and I can’t buy a new camera. So, before I go back to the ghosts, here’s two ghost free Trafalgar Square pictures.

statue-trafalgar-square

Marc Quinn's Alison Lapper Pregnant

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thanet-1As I race against time, wasting it when I should be packing to go to America, I manage to confuse Stars in their Eyes with The Fast Show. And also, when did Matthew Kelly last present Stars in their Eyes? What nonsense will I type next? Will I summon forth the ghost of Leslie Crowther? No.

Here’s Trev, my comedy partner, with his band, Thanet City Rockers… Like Clash City Rockers except they all live in Thanet. And as you can see, he is Welleresque. This photo was taken as they sang “Down in the Tube Station”… Just at the point where Alan the drummer went mentaler than Rick Buckler… just before that bit that goes “the last thing that I saw as I lay there on the floor was Jesus saves painted by an atheist nutter…”. This was their Christmas gig. Happy Christmas one and all. Just for friends and family mind. And so it came to pass that Trev’s mum heard him sing, “I’m down in the tube station at midnight, the wine will be flat and the curry’s gone cold”.

It wasn’t all Jam. There was The Clash, Bowie, The Buzzcocks, The Who, T Rex, The Smiths (Metal Guru merges into Panic). Yes, Trev’s kids, that’s your dad singing, “Hang the DJ”. Happy Christmas everyone.

Well done Paul, Trev, Alan and Dave. A great gig and a great night. Happy Christmas to all friends and family, and anyone out there.

Finally, some lyrics from Rebel Rebel.

“Doo doo doo-doo doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo-doo doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo-doo doo doo doo doo”

Yes kids, it’s your dads singing doo-doo over and over again. I don’t know, the parents of today!

Paul, Alan, Trev & Dave- Thanet City Rockers

Paul, Alan, Trev & Dave- Thanet City Rockers