Starbucks muffin

November 22, 2010

Well what would you do?

It’s meant to be a treat. A few years back I might not have thought twice about a coffee and a muffin in Starbucks. But when I’m spending just over a fiver that I could use on a one way coach ticket to Sheffield, well, I have to be careful with my treats these days.

It shouldn’t matter should it?

It all goes down the same way.

But what would Marco say to a wonky Yorkshire Pudding? Would Nigella give you a lop-sided bun?

But this is just Starbucks. The one opposite Charing Cross Station. Why should they care about quality control when they can pass the (star)buck on to the customer.

I eye my muffin as I wait for my coffee. I know it shouldn’t matter, but that doesn’t look right, I say to the coffee man.

Would you like me to change it?

See? Pass the buck. So, I have to decide. If I say yes, they will throw it away. The guilt sets in. I don’t even say no. I don’t say yes. I just smile like a fool, take my coffee and my lop-sided Lemon and Poppyseed Muffin (my favourite! My treat!) and sit down and glower at it. I hate it.

After a while I change. I eat it. It’s ok. As good as any of the others. Maybe it was more of a treat. Maybe it was a special muffin, just for me. Maybe it had a few more poppyseeds, or a drip more icing.

But really. Starbucks. Life should be easier.

starbucks-toilet

Starbucks gave me no option other than to poo into their sink.

applesThis is Safeways. In Sunnyvale. And if supermarkets could speak to each other (and in the world in my head, they can) How do ya’ like them apples? is what Sunnyvale’s Safeway would ask Hither Green’s Co-op.

It’s not just the apples over here that astonish me. They’ve got a Starbucks too. Now I know there is a Starbucks next to every Starbucks in London. But who’d have thought they had them over here too? Ok, it’s the jetlag kicking in.