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Ok, this post’s title makes no sense. But I like it, and it’s staying. You may even think, when you see the photos, “did you really see the Cure?” I measured Robert Smith between my thumb and my forefinger and he was minute.

Yesterday I got so old,
I felt like I could die,
Yesterday I got so old,
It made me want to cry

And I thought In Between Days was an upbeat song. That’s the trouble with lyrics. They evade me for year after year after year and then somewhere along the line they sneak up on me and I find out that what I thought I was listening to I am no longer listening to. I don’t mean misheard lyrics; none of that Island of Seals for Our Lips are Sealed type of thing. No, I go for decades without any understanding of any of the words, not even titles. I just hear songs.

Even Friday I’m in Love (which I once bought for a girl, thinking it was a romantic thing to do) has these grim lines;

I don’t care if monday’s black
tuesday wednesday heart attack
thursday never looking back
it’s friday I’m in love

For fun, compare and contrast with Morrissey’s lyric from I have Forgiven Jesus;

Monday – humiliation
Tuesday – suffocation
Wednesday – condescension
Thursday – is pathetic
By Friday life has killed me
By Friday life has killed me

Cripes! At least Paul Weller has a sunnier outlook from his old Jam days;

Here comes the weekend – I get to see the girls
Long live the weekend, the weekend is here
(the weekend starts here)

Or perhaps not;

Here comes the weekend – I’m gonna do my head
Long live the weekend, the weekend is dead

Anyways, back to the beginning. Last night I saw the Cure at the 02 arena, thanks to my good friend Bruce who very kindly invited me along. Thank you Bruce. I’m no expert on the Cure, having only ever owned Seventeen Seconds and Faith on vinyl (now locked away in storage), but I’m happy to see any band who can start a song off with a line like “It doesn’t matter if we all die” (100 years). They were supported by Franz Ferdinand, who did their thing. And two bands before that. But we were too busy drinking beer to hear them.

I’d never been to the 02 arena before. It’s huge! And it’s in a tent! And it holds 20,000 people! And we were on the back row!

That might not sound too good. But it was great. Right right right at the back. Looking over 20,000 NME youngsters- and that surprised me. I’m used to going to see bands from my era (Echo and the Bunnymen, Sparks)  where all around you are balding men in their forties. But thank the Cure for keeping existential angst alive and kicking and screaming in the youth of today. I looked ahead and saw teenage girls with swan arms and candy floss seagull nest hair swirl and sway to a man singing a song inspired by Albert Camus’ L’Etranger.

I’m alive
I’m dead
I’m the stranger
Killing an arab

And on the back row we stood like gods. Gods being entertained by a 2mm tall man.

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thanet-1As I race against time, wasting it when I should be packing to go to America, I manage to confuse Stars in their Eyes with The Fast Show. And also, when did Matthew Kelly last present Stars in their Eyes? What nonsense will I type next? Will I summon forth the ghost of Leslie Crowther? No.

Here’s Trev, my comedy partner, with his band, Thanet City Rockers… Like Clash City Rockers except they all live in Thanet. And as you can see, he is Welleresque. This photo was taken as they sang “Down in the Tube Station”… Just at the point where Alan the drummer went mentaler than Rick Buckler… just before that bit that goes “the last thing that I saw as I lay there on the floor was Jesus saves painted by an atheist nutter…”. This was their Christmas gig. Happy Christmas one and all. Just for friends and family mind. And so it came to pass that Trev’s mum heard him sing, “I’m down in the tube station at midnight, the wine will be flat and the curry’s gone cold”.

It wasn’t all Jam. There was The Clash, Bowie, The Buzzcocks, The Who, T Rex, The Smiths (Metal Guru merges into Panic). Yes, Trev’s kids, that’s your dad singing, “Hang the DJ”. Happy Christmas everyone.

Well done Paul, Trev, Alan and Dave. A great gig and a great night. Happy Christmas to all friends and family, and anyone out there.

Finally, some lyrics from Rebel Rebel.

“Doo doo doo-doo doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo-doo doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo-doo doo doo doo doo”

Yes kids, it’s your dads singing doo-doo over and over again. I don’t know, the parents of today!

Paul, Alan, Trev & Dave- Thanet City Rockers

Paul, Alan, Trev & Dave- Thanet City Rockers