Comic Relief Challenge update – day 10

March 14, 2013

Only two days to go! Tomorrow is Comic Relief’s Big Red Nose Day! And I am at a whopping £575 thanks to the immense generosity of all those who have donated. Big thanks and lots of love to yesterday’s lot; Zoe, Robin, Vicky, Veena, Simon, and Naomi. x

£575. I’m astonished. And, if you’re wondering what £575 can do for Comic Relief you can find out about all the people and issues they support here.

A just world free from poverty.

It sounds impossible doesn’t it. But look what happened yesterday! The new Pope is black, and a woman. No? Oh.

But he does travel everywhere by public transport (so they say) and he does shop at Primark and Lidl and he does support the poor and he does give all clothes back to the children who made them and he does believe in gay marriage and he doesn’t  necessarily, always, every day, believe in God.

Not all of the above is true. He does champion the poor I’m told.

A just world free from poverty.

Well, bit by bit.

And there’s no harm in trying.

And you lot are definitely playing your part.

But, for the last two days, I will try your patience by seeing if I can get more of you to give.

See, I set myself an unattainable target of £1986, in honour of the 1986 release of Everything But The Girl’s 1986 album, Baby, The Stars Shine Bright. £575 is truly amazing, but it turns out to be 28% of my target.

I’m persistent and stubborn and mad. I would love to get to £1986.

Yesterday, Comic Relief sent me an email with some tips on how to raise more money. (This email was an improvement on the one from the day before, where they sent me a bizarre treat as a thank you for the money raised so far). This is part of the email:

Here are a few tips to help you:

  • Chase everyone who promised to sponsor you but hasn’t done it yet with our reminder email.
  • Offer a prize for the person who sponsors you the most.
  • Tell everyone you’ll do or wear something silly (preferably, embarrassing) if they help you reach your target.
  • Download our sweepstake poster for an easy way to raise an extra 30 quid.
  • Hold a bake sale, a quiz night or set up a swear box at work to add to your total.
  • Download our old-school sponsorship form, put on a big smile and ask people in person.

Here’s my response. No. No. Ok. No. No. No.

I’m full of Big Nose fun me.

Here’s my reasons: I’m not Duncan Norvelle (odd 80’s style reference); I could offer a prize, but in the name of a just world free from poverty, I would offer everyone one; I have said that if we reach 50% of the target me and Zoe will recreate the cover artwork of Baby, The Stars Shine Bright (for 100% we’ll even do Love Not Money); sounds tricky; I work alone, I can’t bake, I already watch Pointless every night, I have more swear words than I have pounds; ask people in person? I haven’t done that since I was in the Cubs.

There’s my reasons. I always do my best to say yes, so I am a little ashamed of myself.

But not ashamed enough to say, if you can, please donate here.

Quick update: In the time it’s taken me to write this the total has gone up to £610! Fucking amazing… see? I told you I could swear. I feel positively Geldofian. Thank you Gill and anon. x


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