The ice cream police of London

July 16, 2010

Yesterday I went to meet my sister and family in London. They live in California, so when they get the chance to come to London they like to do a bit of sight-seeing. For the kids, you know. I met them outside St. Paul’s, planning to cross the wobbly bridge and head into Tate Modern.

Just before we crossed the bridge my niece and nephew pleaded with their Dad for an ice cream. I took them up to the van (it was a complicated order- two 99’s, one with the flake on the side). We ordered. And that’s when the police pounced. Two of them. Community Police Officers.

They stopped us buying the ice cream and told the van to move away. Who knows what the rules are? No parking? No licence to sell lollies? I don’t know.

This couldn’t stand! I asked the Community Police Officers (are they even real police?) why they wouldn’t let my sweet little niece and nephew have their ice creams. They asked if we had paid. I said no, but we had ordered. That wasn’t good enough. Like Seinfeld’s Soup Nazi they simply shouted “No ice cream for you… two!” Ok, not quite, but they wouldn’t relent.

As we walked away, my niece and nephew in tears (ok,ok, not in tears, just a little disappointed), I shouted back at them “Thank you Community Police Officers”. This is true. I wanted them to arrest me. I wanted to become the Ice Cream One. But they just ignored me.

We spotted another ice cream van 50 yards away. we ran to it before the Ice Cream Nazis got there.


One Response to “The ice cream police of London”

  1. Andrew said

    Simon, It looks like the Youtube Nazis have got to your Soup Nazi clip… It says “Embedding disabled by request” – Watch on Youtube. You’re not one of those “Sleepers” are you. Like the Russian Foxy Lady that has just been exchanged. Don’t know what they exchanged her for, perhaps a 1992 Nissan Sunny?

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