Glastonbury 2010… except it’s become something else

June 28, 2010

I’m just back from Glastonbury. I’ve been once before, to support my mate Trev when his band, Sucker, played on the John Peel stage. You can hear Sucker’s unofficial (and sadly now redundant) England song Go For Goal here. Perhaps they can redo it with the line “we’ll be crying in the street”.

I’m a city and hotel sort not a field and tent type. The first time I went camping, as a student performing at the Buxton Festival, I ended up in hospital (well, a day visit) with damp and aching bones (I’m sure it’s a recognised condition). But that was many years ago, so I thought it was abouty time I tried again. I went off to Argos and bought a tent. And I had a good time, even though the place was flooded and I was hit on the head with a big metal pole when, because of the high winds, a cafe blew over. I just gave in to it all, stuck some carrier bags around my feet and put my socks over the top. Wellies? I didn’t buy them. They’re just not my thing. Like rucksacks. I reluctantly bought one of those but, when possible, carried it in my hands rather than strapping it to my bag. I know, it’s foolish, but we can’t escape the stupid lives we make for ourselves.

Like my phobia. I only have the one… I think. Sure, I’m averse to many things; I’ll always run away from a man wearing a T-shirt that declares “Here Comes Trouble”, but that’s just common sense isn’t it? Not a phobia.

My phobia is some daft kind of claustro one where I can’t bear having a tag put around my wrist. Then they tighten it and I can’t take it off and I go mad and sweat and cry and try to dislocate my thumb. I go to pool tournaments where my team captain, Darren, who is a doctor (ok, of sociology but the band nazis don’t need to know that do they?) comes with me to the band nazi stand to tell them it MUST BE LOOSE or I will get stressed… or rashy… or allergic. Whatever works.

With effort I can get them on and off without stretching them. Oddly, once I know I can get it off I don’t mind it being on. That’s why I can wear a watch.

Last Glastonbury I managed to make my wrist as thin as a pin. This time the stress was starting before I’d left home.

I wasn’t going to have it. It’s just crazy. How can it harm me? And so, I don’t know how, I managed to wear it for the whole festival.

I’ve even considered keeping it on forever. I said to Ben (Norris- top dog comedian who kindly invited me along as his guest) that I wouldn’t take it off til the day I died. I lied. It’s off now.

But this was going to be about Glastonbury. I was going to put some pics up. Now I have to stop and go off to choir.

I’ll have to do my Glasto stuff tomorrow.

Bloody phobias.


One Response to “Glastonbury 2010… except it’s become something else”

  1. Colin Brown said

    Oh me too. No backpacker me. Camping just asks for a downpour. I am now a confirmed suitcaser.

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