Should I let my daughter date David Platt?

December 21, 2009

My daughter is dating David Platt and I’m not happy.

For those who know me you know I believe Coronation Street to be real. For those who don’t know me, you’ll most likely think I’m just being funny, or weird, or perverse. But the great thing about beliefs is that that’s all you need. Reason goes out of the window. I believe Coronation Street is real… so there!

And psycho David Platt is going out with my daughter!

My daughter is Kirsty Leigh Porter.

Kirsty Leigh Porter (pic courtesy of Holy Soap)

Kirsty was only my daughter for a day. Trev and myself were writing for a show called My Spy Family. Kirsty played Marcy Desmond, and in one of our episodes, The Quiz Night Affair, I played her father Mr Desmond. He was a wild haired weirdo. I didn’t have to do much. Just turn up.

But now she’s changed her name to Zoe and is slowly creeping into Corrie as bloody Platt’s girlfriend. I’m going to have to put my foot down.

8 Responses to “Should I let my daughter date David Platt?”

  1. Chris said

    I like the way your mind works… But I’m pleased it’s yours, and mine doesn’t work like that! I haven’t watched Corrie for about 15 years… Is David Platt the same lttle kid I remember back then, or has he changed in a Tracey Barlow style? And if he has, how does your belief explain the transformation?

    Merry Christmas Simon Out Of Trev And Simon.

  2. Samantha said

    Well, everyone agrees at the moment that it’s up to you! (Or rather 0% say it’s not up to you) I say get involved, perhaps go and kidnap her, stating your parental rights! :-)

  3. Trevor Neal said

    David Platt isn’t “Psycho” – Stuart Pierce is “Pyscho” – what’s he doing in Coronation Street anyway? Let your daughter date him – he’s a bit old maybe but he’s got to be worth a bob or two. Just be thankful it’s not Gazza.

  4. Trevor Neal said

    Sorry about the two different spellings of “Pcysho”.

  5. Simon Hickson said

    Lots of helpful advice there. Though when I last looked at the poll, it was 50/50 between being up to me and it being the little cartoon fella. And one or two just thinking of me as an idiot (in a nice way no doubt).

    Chris, yes, he is the same David Platt. He’s nuts now, and most unlikeable. He did change, yes. AZs one of my Twitter friends pointed out, they go to a soap surgeon. It’s a simple procedure and usually takes place around the age of 14, when the gods who make Corrie decide something needs to be done to make sure they can sell sexy calendars.

    Happy Christmas to you all.

  6. Andrew Key said

    Does David Platt work for Syco Productions (Simon Cowells TV Company)? In which case he would be the Syco Psycho (correct spelling x2). Your daughter is a bit dim though and perfect for David. He can manipulate her easily. Have you noticed how orange David Platt is? I reckon the next child from the village of the damned will be Simon, Peter Barlows son. He is well strange.

  7. Simon Hickson said

    That’s no surprise- his grandparents are Ken Barlow and that nazi from Colditz!

  8. edward mckeen said

    Well, i can finally write ‘lol’. That’s very funny. David Platt as Stuart Pearce. You don’t get that everyday. What next? ‘Safe Hands’ Shearer? Bobby ‘Do I Not Like That’ Robson? Made my day that did. And made me laugh out loud. Jobs a good ‘un.

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